Emotion, emotion, emotion.
Show me the emotion.
Don’t assume the reader is getting what’s in your head; be sure you put it on the page.
Your reader is always from Missouri.
If you add a dash of emotion, as in showing me facial expressions and thumping hearts and sweaty brows and trembling hands and darting eyes – so I the reader conclude how your characters feel about what’s happening, I’ll be much more immersed in your story.
Always have someone acting the way you want the reader to react. Show it.
You almost can’t do it too much.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about, ask. I’ll explain. This is what’s missing in your writing, and it’s holding your story back.